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Rotted Podcast

“Everything has beauty, but not everyone sees it” Said Confucius. That's what our mission is at Rotted Podcast and it gets tested every episode when we sit down and discuss movies that received zero percent critic review on Rotten Tomatoes. Confucius also never had to watch InAppropriate Comedy, The Ridiculous 6 or Saving Christmas so what did he know.
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Sep 22, 2017

They'll Get You in the End!

We watched the Charles Band even more classic Gremlins ripoff Ghoulies 2 and discuss why it's so much better than the first one.

Please Rate and Review us on iTunes!

Sep 19, 2017

They'll Get you in the end!

We watched the Charles Band classic Gremlins ripoff Ghoulies. This movie was a surprise hit that enabled 3 more sequels and helped Full Moon make about 400 more films throughout the next few years. 

We included several clips from the making of documentary From Toilets to Terror that is a recommend to anyone who is interested in this movie or Full Moon Entertainment.

Stay Tuned next week for our review of the much better 0% film Ghoulies 2! Please Rate and Review us on iTunes!

Sep 8, 2017

Our second Cannon films podcast we talk the 1986 Chuck Norris Vehicle Firewalker

A pair of adventurers try to track down an ancient Aztec/Mayan/Egyptian/Apache hoard of gold. 

Will this blatant Indiana Jones ripoff be as well received as our last Cannon film American Ninja? 

Please Rate and Review us on iTunes!

 

 

Aug 27, 2017

From one of the most famous shark eating jet ski memes around, comes Shark Attack 3: Megalodon.

We're joined by Special Guests Filmmakers Muhammad and Josh on our longest episode ever!

The film stars Doctor Who's John Barrowman and a bunch of Bulgarian actors playing Mexicans. 

 

Synopsis: When two researchers discover a colossal shark's tooth off the Mexican coast their worst fears surface - the most menacing beast to ever rule the waters is still alive and mercilessly feeding on anything that crosses its path.

Aug 16, 2017

We watched the fourth installment in the 3 Ninjas series starring Jim Varney, Hulk Hogan, Lonnie Anderson and the final film of Victor Wong. 

It grossed $375,805 domestically, making it the least profitable of the franchise by far and thus ending the franchise.

 

IMDB Trivia: Three young boys, Rocky, Colt and Tum Tum together with their neighbor girl, computer whiz Amanda are visiting Mega Mountain amusement park when it is invaded by an army of ninjas led by evil Medusa, who wants to take over the park and hold the owners for ransom. Kids and retired TV star Dave Dragon, who made his farewell appearance at the park at the time the ninjas appeared, have to break Medusa's vicious plans.

Aug 10, 2017

The funniest movie about a school shooting since Gus Van Sant's Elephant.

A movie made entirely around the premise of getting Cloris Leachman to say Throbzilla while holding up a giant dildo. Also starring the late great John Heard who gets to walk around with a prosthetic boner.

Please rate and review us on iTunes or wherever you listen. 

 

Aug 3, 2017

On a very special episode of Rotted Podcast, Adam and Chase head down to the Alamo Drafthouse to see the Emoji Movie! Does this film deserve to be in the Criterion Collection? Or is it a two hour add for Apps?

 

RT Description: This animated comedy takes place in Textopolis, a world inside a smartphone that's inhabited by various emojis. There, an emoji named Gene (voiced by T.J. Miller) is ashamed that he has multiple facial expressions while his colleagues only have one each, and he embarks on a quest to be like everyone else. James Corden, Anna Faris, Jennifer Coolidge, Patrick Stewart, and Maya Rudolph also lend their voices to this film from Sony Pictures Animation.

Jul 20, 2017

Why does Ron Siler look like a walking penis?

Live Wire is a 1992 action movie, written by Bart Baker, directed by Christian Duguay and starring Pierce Brosnan, Ron Silver, Ben Cross and Lisa Eilbacher.

The plot revolves around a rash of seemingly inexplicable, explosive spontaneous human combustions and Danny O'Neill (Brosnan), a bomb disposal expert that gets involved and will eventually have to solve the case.

 

Jun 26, 2017

For our episode this week we talk about the 1979 Hal Needham's Western parody The Villain starring Kirk Douglas, Arnold Schwarzenegger and Ann-Margret's boobs.

It's like Looney Tunes without the Tunes!

"Cactus" Jack Slade (Douglas) is the meanest bad man in the west or so he thinks. When a bank robbery goes awry, he lands in jail facing a hangman's noose! When the corrupt owner of the bank offers him a job, Jack sees a chance to both stay alive and get rich in the process. All he has to do is steal a strongbox full of money the banker lent to Mr. Parody Jones who needs it to keep his mining operation going. If he defaults on the loan, our "friendly" banker takes over the mine. Ms. Charming Jones (Margret) comes to town to collect the money and take it back to her father, Parody. To ensure the money makes it back home, Parody has called in a favor from a man who owes him a life debt. Enter Handsome Stranger (Schwarzenegger).

 

Please rate and review us on iTunes or wherever you listen. 

Jun 12, 2017

For our episode this week we talk about one of the great Adam West's 0% movies Super Caper.

Adam West is of course the best part. Unfortunately he's in the movie for less than a minute. 

How did they get so many good actors into this "religious" movie? 

IMDB Synopsis: A good guy with no powers joins a superhero team with no clue against a bad guy with no shame (and directed by a director with no talent.)

 

Please rate and review us on iTunes or wherever you listen. 

Jun 6, 2017

One of the most baffling mockbusters ever made. Filmed entirely on Green Screen, using all animated 3d stock footage, this Incredible Hulk film is a parody without any jokes. 

 

It's available on Amazon Prime for free but that doesn't mean you should watch it.

 

Does this movie deserve a 0% on Rotten Tomatoes? Let us know your thoughts! Also rate and review us on itunes to help us build a bigger audience.

May 29, 2017

Ex-Special Forces soldier Louis Stevens returns to Miami to find his former high school overrun by drugs and violence. A master of the Brazilian martial art, capoeira, Stevens pledges to straighten out a dozen of the school's worst students by teaching them this demanding and highly-disciplined fighting style.

It's like Stand and Deliver without all the boring school work.

Does this movie deserve a 0% on Rotten Tomatoes? Let us know your thoughts! Also rate and review us on itunes to help us build a bigger audience.

May 9, 2017

What's the terminal velocity of rice?

For our first episode of MMMH we talk the pacifistic action movie Peacekeepers starring Dolph Lundgren and Roy Scheider as the president!

The whole movie is about the nuclear football so it's pretty relevant with the current administration. 

Does this movie deserve a 0% on Rotten Tomatoes? Let us know your thoughts! Also rate and review us on itunes to help us build a bigger audience.

May 2, 2017

Jonathan Demme passed away last month so we decided why not honor him by doing a bastardization of one of his most brilliant pieces of art.

 

The film was directed, written produced and starred Italian dime store Leslie Nielsen Ezio Greggio. He narrates the whole movie so get ready to not understand most of it not that it matters because it's mostly nonsense anyways.

 Where to start on this movie. It’s a parody of psycho and Silence of the lambs although a little bit more psycho. This film feels more relevant today. Im sort of amazed it hasn't had a major resurgence with the alt-right community. I mean it has everything the rabid trump supporters and conservatives love. Starting with Hillary Clinton getting arrested. Lock her up lock her up.

Then we get some tasteful transgender jokes about gender identity...scary. That’s not all, black men beating up cops, jokes about flint michigan, carbon taxing a whole lot of sexual assault and don't forget black face. John Astin, I thought I knew you.

There are a few clever things that made us not rate it a full on zero percent. I guess if you have 30 jokes a minute every hour a couple have to hit. Some of the best include the telephone split screen gag, the inner monologue but from a diegetic source.

 

They also for some reason think that just referencing movie titles should be in place of a joke.This movie also has an amazing array of cameos by great directors.

They also have a completely unnecessary star wars cantina scene.

 

So overall it's not a great film, but it's nowhere near as bad as the Jason Friedberg, Aaron Seltzer movie movies we got in the late aughts.

 

Its pretty much right in the middle between the classics of Zucker brothers and mel brooks and the awful movie movies. Sitting with Spy Hard and Jane Austen's Mafia.


Overall we gave it a 32%

Apr 24, 2017

We finally found another 0% Gem!

Since Terrorvision we've been hoping to find a film that we can honestly endorse and this seems to be it. Will it take the best 0% movie throne from Terrorvision? Listen and find out!

 

Please rate and review us on iTunes. It helps us out a lot go up in the rankings. Also hit us up if you own a Caterpuppy toy!

Apr 18, 2017

Throwback from Our Films Against Humanity Video Podcast from a few years back. This movie is technically a 2% because one reviewer decided it was a 5/5 star film.

Check out filmsagainsthumanity at youtube.com for our original video podcasts and videos. We'll be back in a few days with another full episode!

 

 

 

 

 

Apr 5, 2017

Did Dennis Rodman's career ever rebound after this disaster? 

IMDB Synopsis: Basketball superstar Dennis Rodman stars as a hip Interpol agent attempting to defeat the deadly plans of a crazed arms dealer.

Robert Downey Jr. was replaced with Dane Cook because Downey dropped out and they needed someone within a few days.

Is this movie cursed as three of the actors died from heart disease way before they're time.

Be sure to rate and subscribe on itunes! It really helps us and means a lot.

 Follow us on twitter @filmsagainst and facebook here: https://www.facebook.com/rottedpodcast/

Mar 23, 2017

The best movie about an small ugly alien that gets stuck on earth and has to befriend a boy to help him find his family that isn't ET.

The Washington Post put it like this in 1988: “Forget about calling home; E.T., call lawyer.”

Is this movie more consumerism propaganda then Saving Christmas?

Who buys a house for their wheelchair bound son on the edge of a cliff?

When the screenwriter wrote that Mac becomes was addicted to coke do you think the production designer just got the wrong coke?

 

Be sure to rate and subscribe on itunes! It really helps us build our audience.

 

Mar 13, 2017

WE talk Bill Paxton's Penultimate film Term Life and his only 0% movie on Rotten Tomatoes.The film is directed by Ralphie from Christmas Story (Peter Billingsley).

How did such a great cast and a solid premise turn into this boring Father Daughter "heist" film? This film is based on a comic book but you would never be able to tell by what's on screen.

Be sure to rate and subscribe on itunes! It really helps us and means a lot.

 

Follow us on twitter @filmsagainst and facebook here: https://www.facebook.com/rottedpodcast/

Mar 6, 2017

Why couldn't they just LEAVE BRITNEY ALONE. 

Lifetime does another one of the speculation heavy, fact-lite "biopic" about the love life of Britney Spears.

Want to hear some great Britney Spears songs? Go to Spotify cause this doesn't have any of them.

Who doesn't want to see Britney get a Furby? Or have a half assed NSYNC sing her happy birthday. Did you know Britney and Justin Timberlakebroke up with an epic dance battle?

Be sure to rate and subscribe on itunes! Follow us on twitter @filmsagainst and facebook here: https://www.facebook.com/rottedpodcast/

 

Feb 25, 2017

Who thought it would be a good idea to make a movie about soccer executives? Apparently Sepp Blatter and the brilliant minds at FIFA. 

Learn the exciting story of how coca cola and Adidas became sponsors of FIFA! Dazzle at a group of drunk Europeans try to get the evil British to let them make up the rules and regulations of Soccer. Marvel at Gerard Depardieu's buttnose! 

A movie where producer Sepp Blatter makes himself a hero that is staunchly anti corruption which came out the same week as the 2015 FIFA corruption scandal which eventually forced him to resign. 

Other Questions we had:

Why does everyone look like a Dick Tracy Villain?

Can girls play soccer?

How did they get actors like Tim Roth, Sam Neill, and Gerard Depardieu? I guess I'd sell out for a million dollars.

 

 

 

 

Feb 15, 2017

We talk about the worst movie we have ever seen on the show: Foodfight!

This movie has one of the most interesting backstories featuring stolen hard drives, corporate espionage, and some of the worst animation conditions imaginable. 

"The movie stars Dex Dogtective, a name-play on the fact that he is a dog detective, is the only relatable character of the film Foodfight!, voice by Charlie Sheen. This protagonist, something to cling onto while you cringe and question your life choices and goals, is trapped in the universe of a grocery store solving cases and cracking down on crime." http://foodfightmovie.wikia.com/wiki/Dex_Dogtective

"This movie actually took $65,000,000 to make, but it is said that they spent $64,990,000 on very psychadelic drugs and Mr.Clean products."

We'll I'm going to go kill myself so enjoy the ep!

Feb 9, 2017

This 0% movie is a nostalgia-fest even if you haven't seen it.

Featuring the first feature performance of Hawkeye's Jeremy Renner. 

Is this plot what inspired Donald Trump to be president?

We go into the history of the National Lampoon movies, list the name of the bands in the most 90's sounding soundtrack ever, talk about how great Kids in the Hall was, and blaze some bowls bra!

 

Thanks for listening!

 

Jan 31, 2017

Our newest 0% movie is American Ninja from 1985. We go into the history of the series and the production company Canon Films who made some of the most badass films of the 80's.

Did the director know how the army worked?

How did Michael Dudikoff get the role over 2000 actors with a voice like that and no martial arts training? 

IMDB Synopsis: American soldier, obviously very skilled in martial arts, single-handedly takes on mercenaries in the Philippines.

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Jan 27, 2017

We watched another really bad horror film. One Missed Call is an americanized version of an only ok Japanese horror film. Made at the end of the J-horror craze of the 200's this movie tries to combine the mechanics of the Ring and Final Destination. Also features some of the worst CGI of the year.

 

Please rate and review us if you like the show!

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